I almost titled this post with lyrics from a Mariah Carey song...

And then I came to my senses.

Friends, over the last month I have opened this page over and over, contemplating telling the internet what's been on my mind, what's been going on in my life, but I can't bring myself to do it because, as I think I've mentioned before, it does not involve only me. All I can say is that the devil is doing his very best to bring me down, and I have been defeated for a while. But now I am fighting back with everything God and I have. If you wouldn't mind, a prayer or two from you would be absolutely wonderful.

When I'm down, I love to read things that are uplifting and encouraging, I try not to wallow in self pity... So here are a few things I've come across that I love that I would like to share with you :)

When we deliberately choose to obey God, He will tax the remotest star and the last grain of sand to assist us with all His almighty power.

--Oswald Chambers

Whatever your version of femininity has been up to this moment - God desires to offer you hope and a glorious future. Jesus Christ can take a life that has been bruised, rejected, or squandered and make it completely new. He can empower a weak and helpless life to rise up and conquer. No matter where you’ve been or what you’ve done or how far from Him you feel right now - He can transform you into a radiant, victorious, world-changing set-apart young woman.

--Leslie Ludy, Set-Apart Femininity

And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.

--Haruki Murakami

Picture yourself when you were five. In fact, dig out a photo of little you at that time and tape it to your mirror. How would you treat her, love her, feed her? How would you nurture her if you were the mother of little you? I bet you would protect her fiercely while giving her space to spread her itty-bitty wings. She’d get naps, healthy food, imagination time, and adventures into the wild. If playground bullies hurt her feelings, you’d hug her tears away and give her perspective. When tantrums or meltdowns turned her into a poltergeist, you’d demand a loving time-out in the naughty chair. From this day forward I want you to extend that same compassion to your adult self.

--Kris Carr

I am slowly but surely learning that God loves me even in my darkest times, even when I have deliberately disobeyed him and even when I turn to things other than Him for help. If you're going through a rough time too, I hope you know God loves you no matter what. 

Talk to you all soon!